Wednesday, June 10, 2015

Parents And The Power of Coffee

It all started with a lack of whipping cream bright and early on a Tuesday morning.
I was roused from slumber prematurely and although my eyelids felt like they each had twenty pound dumbbells hanging off of them, I decided to push through the pain and make breakfast for my husband before he left for work.
I slowly pealed my body out from under the covers, and off of the mattress before I shuffled into the kitchen, and blindly felt my way to the refrigerator. I didn't have the strength to lift the weight of my eyelids as I opened the door and began searching for the ingredients needed for the morning meal.
After groping around inside of the fridge for a full five minutes, the ingredient I was searching for seemed to escape my grasp. Suddenly the dumbbells that kept me prisoner to the dark, lifted and the blinding light from the refrigerator cast a sharp illumination on the truth.
There would be no whipping cream for our pancakes this morning.
Clearly the vultures had descended and wrapped their talons around the coveted whipping cream, carrying it away with them, and escaping soundlessly.
This is not the first time they have pounced on precious delicacies in our home. In fact, their thieving visits have become more frequent as of late, and we have suffered great loss. This time it was whipping cream, but before that it was the sugar....not just any sugar, though. It was the priceless jeweled sugar....the pure, organic, evaporated cane crystals, that were set aside for the next enchanting batch of the pure Fountain of Youth, most commonly referred to as
After such great loss, the missing whipping cream paled in comparison, and yet once again the feeling of sheer terror at the thought of what could be swiped from the galley next, left us with an insecurity that is indescribable.
Something must be done to lift the impending doom.
As my husband and I sipped our cups of steamy, hot, organic, brew that morning, our minds suddenly came alive and we formed a plan.
These vultures like coffee.
These vultures can read.
These vultures are smart.
We knew we must stop them at all costs!
Coffee would most assuredly be the next item their talons were itching to swipe.
And so, armed with one orange sticky note and a black Sharpie pen, we lowered the boom.
On the orange sticky note, we wrote a clear message for the visiting vultures, that could not be missed.
There, on the shiny face of the stainless steel coffee pot, we used the sticky on that note, to give our robbers a clear message:
About an hour later after my husband went out to earn more money for whipping cream, I heard a distinct rustling in the kitchen.
Aha! The vultures were back, and this time they were not discreet.
They were MAD!
After the rustling ceased, I tip-toed into the galley, where I discovered a few notes of their own, stuck haphazardly around the original orange note. The entire coffee pot was covered, but....

The gleaming coffee pot was covered in notes, some of which were smudged.
Clearly the work of vulture's talons.

They may have attempted lifting the coffee, but that orange sticky note packed a powerful message, and these thieves respected it.
They even offered to work off the things they had helped themselves to, and immediately began the process.
In the end, it turns out they weren't really vultures at all, but rather some hard working kiddos who have a taste for organic sugar, whipping cream, and coffee.
Turns out we have a lot in common.
they are working and they are earning.
And we are drinking coffee together while we eat pancakes with berries and whipping cream.
The moral of this story is this:
Coffee is a powerful tool.
Use it to your advantage and work magically gets done, relationships are built, and peace will be returned to the galley.


  1. I so enjoyed reading this - LOL! :)

    1. Haha, thanks Lisa! I'm sure you experience missing items when you know you just restocked them too, right? So....frustrating! But...laughing about it is a lot less painful than reacting in frustration, and the response from the kids is much better than when I get upset with them. It's better for them to pay the price for their deeds than us, right? :) :)